Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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