i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I will be naked everywhere
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
