Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Floor bacon is actually really good
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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