Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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