just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
