If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
