the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
