i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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