Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
We need to rekindle our bromance
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
