He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
