in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
