I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Randomize
