Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
