I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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