I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
