she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize