I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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