I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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