I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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