i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
