Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
