In the future we'll all be gay
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
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