It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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