She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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