I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
