just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
