Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
