I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
