so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
