last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
