haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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