Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Randomize
