it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Well I just put wine in my tea
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
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