You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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