normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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