so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
