WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
