if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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