I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
My pussy is not your playground.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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