You just made me feel so damn special
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
