Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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