Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Randomize
