we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
