Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
