its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
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