she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
