Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize