I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
