R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
