If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Mom said you looked used
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
